Memorial at sea, Ash Scattering, Neptune Memorials
Ideas for a burial at sea ceremony in San Francisco
Burial at sea ceremonies have been in practice for as long as there have been seaworthy vessels from which to conduct them. From Sir Francis Drake’s memorial at sea in 1596 to Robin Williams’s 2014 ash scattering ceremony in San Francisco Bay, it’s a tradition that has brought comfort and closure to bereaved families from all walks of life for centuries.
And of course, in the Bay Area there’s no shortage of potential locations for your marine memorial service, in the Bay itself like Angel Island, by the lighthouse on Yerba Buena Island, the bow and arrow on the city front just to name a few.
“The changing of the watch” tradition for seamen is the ringing of a bell 8 times.
We like to incorporate this tradition into all the memorials we perform. It is not only symbolic for the end of a shift but also the passing of a sailor is marked with the ringing of eight bells and the beginning of another. ... With the end of the watch, eight bells are sounded and the sailor was relieved. It is a very poignant moment.
San Francisco Bay, Golden Gate Bridge, Angel Island and the Pacific Ocean have special meaning for many and all make for a beautiful backdrop to release ashes into the sea. Our Captain is available to advise on any one of a number of beautiful locations for your private service.
Gas Light, a 72 foot Scow Schooner replica and tall ship is an excellent yacht for scattering ashes. She is not only stable and comfortable but there is plenty of room both above and below decks. You and your guests enjoy the ride and the sights and sounds of San Francisco Bay.
Guidelines for a burial at sea in the Bay Area
But how do you go about arranging a burial at sea in California? What rules and regulations need to be followed, and what ideas will work best for your family’s needs and budget?
When arranging a burial at sea, be sure to refer to the national guidelines established by the Environmental Protection Agency (EPA). Burials at sea are allowed under a general permit that requires no special application provided the following rules are adhered to:
All materials released into or over the water must be readily biodegradable.
Ultimately, however, the EPA leaves governance up to each individual state. Therefore, as dictated by California law, ceremonies may also take place in navigable rivers and inland waterways (including the Bay itself) as long as they take place at least 500 yards from shore.
Ideas for arranging a burial at sea in San Francisco
Attended vs. unattended services
An unattended burial at sea involves passing your loved one’s remains to the staff to take to sea while you and your family remain on land. This is usually more cost effective than the alternative, and can be a good solution for tight budgets or cases where family members may not be able to travel to San Francisco. Unattended services may be available in the Bay area for as little as $150
An attended service, on the other hand, allows family members to participate in the burial at sea in person and conduct the rest of the memorial service on the vessel itself. Here are Bay Lights Charters we can do a morning trip for as little as $800 for up to 6-people on our 35-foot trawler. We can also accommodate up to 49 guests on our large tall ship-call for pricing on this yacht.
Ceremony ideas
The details of the ceremony itself will depend on the preferences of you and your family and, of course, any special rules or guidelines the boat you charter may ask you to follow. The following suggestions comply with both California law and EPA standards.
Create a theme for the ceremony. Particularly if your service will not be a religious one, a theme can be a great way to add an even more personal touch to the proceedings. The things your loved one cared for the most in life often offer excellent inspiration for how to celebrate their memory after they’ve passed on. For example, if the San Francisco 49ers were your loved one’s team ask guests to dress in their best 49’ers logo wear… you get the idea.
Choose flowers or memorial objects with special significance. Though lilies may be traditional, you may choose to include your loved one’s favorite flowers, like rose petals or sunflowers instead if you find it more meaningful.
We have seen guests write notes to the diseased on rice paper, this way the note disappears upon entering the water. Writing notes or letters to your dearly departed loved one to be released during the ceremony may also bring a sense of peace. Other personal objects, such as photos or paper keepsakes, may also be released into the water during the ceremony, as long as they are biodegradable and do not contain any chemicals that could be harmful to marine life.
Create mementos together before the ceremony. For some families, it may be comforting to spend time together prior to the memorial service creating memorial objects such as wreaths, bouquets, or paper cranes or boats to release in honor of their loved one’s memory.
Include prayers, poems, prose, or songs that speak to your loved one’s beliefs and interests. “Alone I Will Not Be” by Captain Chad Theesfeld is a traditional choice or Amazing Grace is popular too, but feel free to include readings from any religious or non religious texts that reflect your family’s faith or literature that may have held a special place in your loved one’s heart.
The key is to make it personal. We once had a service for a gentleman who brewed beer and his wife poured a can of his beer upon the ashes. She said it was what he wanted.
Preparing for burial at sea: choosing a cremation provider
While a burial at sea does not have to involve cremation, many choose it because it makes for a simpler, easier planning process and ceremony. In most cases, it’s preferable to arrange a direct cremation and a burial at sea ceremony separately, rather than arranging both through a traditional funeral home.
Not only is direct cremation more affordable, it also leaves you free to arrange your loved one’s memorial service on a schedule that’s right for you and your family, rather than being restricted to the rapid timetable most funeral homes operate on. You should be able to relax knowing your loved one is in good hands while you focus on the next step—planning the memorial at sea ceremony they deserve.
What does a 2-hour memorial look like on Blue Skies?
“The estuary was quiet - it was just Blue Skies in the mellow morning sunshine on the whole of the bay. The container ships were docked, the loading cranes were still, and it seemed like the marina was sleeping in.
But Blue Skies was on an important mission - we were out for a San Francisco Bay ash scattering. Everyone, 6 guests total, gathered on the back deck near the stern of the ship, enjoying the fresh breezes and bay bridge views on the horizon. No one spoke, no one stirred, it was more of a meditation than a cruise. We took care to come up to the lighthouse on Yerba Buena Island, enjoying impressive coastline views of the foaming breaker waves and lighthouse on the hilltop.
We motored under the Bay bridge, listening to the hum and roar of the cars passing overhead. Then upon arrival at our destination for the ash scattering, with crystal clear views of the Ferry Building and the San Francisco waterfront ahead and lovely treasure island behind us, the memorial started.
Our guests stood and lined up at the rail, holding red and pink roses. The petals floated away with the scattering ceremony, bright dashes of color floating out to sea in the gentle water. Everyone took a turn telling stories. There were tears of sorrow and joy simultaneously. It was beautiful. “- Captain Steve
Want to know the history of spreading Ashes on the water?
The practice of spreading ashes at sea has a long and storied history. For centuries, many cultures around the world have had traditions of cremating their dead and then scattering the ashes in the ocean.
In some cases, this was done as a way to honor the spirit of the deceased, while in others it was seen as a way to ensure the soul could make its journey to the afterlife.
The practice of spreading ashes at sea is believed to date back thousands of years. Ancient Greek and Roman cultures would often cremate their dead and then deposit the ashes in the ocean. This practice was seen as symbolic of the death of the body and a way to ensure the safe passage of the departed’s soul to the afterlife. Additionally, spreading ashes at sea was thought to bring good luck to the living family members of the deceased.In recent centuries, the practice of spreading ashes at sea has become more widespread, with many religious and secular organizations now offering services to help facilitate the closure for the deceased.
If we can answer any questions, please reach out 415-405-5279 or email us at info@BayLightsCharters.com we are here to help anyway we can.
One recent guest added the following in our Ships Log:
"Thank you for such a memorable and perfect venue to lay our grandfather, John to rest. He was a true lover of the sea and having all his family onboard meant everything! There was not a dry eye onboard as we rang the 8 bells and poured his favorite scotch along side his ashes. We all could feel him smiling down at us. Thank you for EVERYTHING! “- John III